Of Pirate Hearts
by JackySparrowsRum
Summary: This will be my drabble series with the prompts from the 'Broken Compass' forum.Enjoy!
1. Chap 1 Prompt: Graveyard

Jack hung his head as he walked alone through the gusty winds beneath the iron gray sky. In his hands he clutched a bunch of white lilies, her favorite flowers.

Some how, he hated and yet loved the feeling of coming here. So melancholy yet still, in a way, joyful because you knew your loved ones were near.

All in all, it was a bittersweet place to be. Jack glanced over his shoulder, just to check yet again that he was not being followed. No, he was not.

His feet had finally taken him to his destination. A headstone bore the name ' Marina Sarah Sparrow '. Her name. His baby sister's name. The poor thing had died when she was only five.

Jack split the bunch of flowers in half before placing them lovingly upon the stone. He then placed the other half on the grave next to the little girl's. This one's name read, ' Irene Delilah Sparrow '. His mum.

The grown man stood up and wiped at the tears forming in his brown eyes.

"I love you."


	2. Chap 2 Prompt: Chaos

**I got this strange image in my head after watching Talledaga Nights of Jack driving a racecar, so I wrote this!**

Jack screamed as he drove down the street in his brand spankin' new Wonder Bread car. He was having a grand old time thanks to the Ricky Bobby guy. Never again would the Navy catch him.

Never again would he have to face being slapped by a woman, he could just run her over.

"GET OUTTA MY WAY! JACKY SPARROW **OWNS** THIS TOWN!" Jack yelled as he honked the horn, which was weird seeing as racecars don't have horns.

Then he heard a snarling noise. He turned around slowly, only to see a growling cougar behind him.

"Oh bugger." He slammed on the brakes, sending the cat flying into the windshield and out onto the road. Jack watched in amazement as the cougar chased donkeys, people,and chickens.

"Well, now that that's over.....where's the nearest tavern?" Jack shrugged before he started the engine again and drove off into the sunset.


	3. Chap 3 Prompt: Pintel's Neckerchief

**There never was or would be a more beautiful thing than a boy and his best friend. Whether that friend was bald or hairy, gentle or rough, or walked on four legs or 's right everyone, this is a story about Pintel and his dog, who is an OC obviously, Tanner and I'm warning you all now, this is another of those sad, droopy one-shots I write.**

The thirteen-year old couldn't believe it, he refused to. There was no way his best friend could be dead. But yet, there he was before him, the body of his beloved dog Tanner.

The thing had been like a brother to him since that day two years ago when he'd followed him home off the street. To Pintel, they'd seemed quite alike. Both friendless and with no fine pedigree to boast of.

Yet they had each other. Whenever one was scared the other comforted him. Whenever they needed help getting out of trouble the other always made an excellent distraction.

But all that had come to an abrupt end. The dog hadn't seemed ill the day before, but rather quite happy and content, his regular self. Pintel could only assume he'd died of old age, after all, he had no idea how old the mutt really was.

He sighed as he looked upon the pathetic canine, memorizing him before he had to put him in the ground. His eyes fell on the faded red scrap of material he'd tied around the animal's neck as a sign of ownership.

He then squatted beside his pet and tenderly removed the 'collar' . As he stood back up, Pintel tied the bandanna around his own neck, so that he would always remember his dear and most best friend.


	4. Chap 4 Prompt: Jack & Bootstrap Pigsty

**Warning:Contains slight pig abuse and some language.**

"Oh, 'ere once was a pirate called Jack!"A voice rang out over the sounds of hogs scuffling and grunting as they walked around the pigsty, wondering why in God's name these two men were in their mudhole.

" 'e fell on 'is face with a **smack**!"A second voice joined in. The owners of both voices started to laugh insanely. Jack Sparrow and 'Bootstrap' Bill Turner were having the time of their lives. Drunk as skunks the pair were, and their singing voices matching the smell of their bodies.

The pair then started laughing idiotically about nothing. Jack finally regained his self control and spoke.

"I've a thought, Billy,m'boy!"He poor pigs looked rather scared as they huddled in a corner.

"What would tha' be thought...thought be.....be through...that be?"Bill stumbled. You could easily tell he didn't get piss drunk very often.

"We play a game and....oooh!Cookie!"Jack shouted joyfully, like a child on christmas morning as he picked up a potato.

"Jack, that's the weirdest pitata I've ever seen."

"But tha's why iz a cookie, dumb ass."Jack then threw the potato at one of the pigs, making it run away from him squealing.

Bootstrap started to laugh again and fell backwards, landing in some fairly fresh pig yuck.

"Haha!Shit-head!"Jack hollered as he threw another chunk of pig poo at Bill.

" 'Lay that!"Bill growled back, pulling his head out of the muck with a sucking then chucked a piece of pig poo at Jack.

"Ew! Hay! I'm the Chap'n here so...."Bill had thrown another piece which hit Jack square in the mouth. Jack started to he finally rid his mouth of the disgusting stuff, he pounced at Bill, knocking him back into the muck.

The poor pigs that had the displeasure of watching the two drunks fight glanced at one another.

"What're they doin', Mum?" One little piglet asked.

"I dunno....but it's weird."The sow replied.

"I think they're mating."Another sow whispered.

The hogs watched for a while until the two men finally got tired and fell asleep in the mud pigs then curled up by the snoring pirates and fell asleep.


	5. Chap 5 Prompt Jolly Mon

**Warning:This drabble has only a small bit to do with PotC. It is more about the boat than anything !**

Once upon a time, there was a little boat called the _Jolly Mon_ that was once sailed by Captain Jack Sparrow, who 'borrowed' it without asking from it's previous owner, Anamaria. Jack somehow managed to let the ship get an unacceptable level of water in it, and so it began to sink.

Despite his brave attempts to save it, (Oh yes, throwing out one bucketful of water will make it all better) the ship sank further. Luckily for Jack, it sank just as he got into Port Royal. The poor boat lay forgotten overnight while some other pirates attacked the town.

The next day, a shark was swimming through the water, though why it was in such shallow waters is beyond me. It spotted the boat and swam over.

"Fascinating!" The shark said in a scientific voice. "A sunken ship. I should bring it over to my labratory for examination."

The shark then swam away to get some more scienc-ey sharks. The band of sharks then took the little boat to their secret shark labratory where they preformed strange tests on , after about a month, they got bored with it and so patched up the hole through which the water came through in the first place, and raised to boat to the surface where it floated to shore.

On that very shore, a woman pirate was being marooned by Jack Sparrow.

"Nothing personal, just can't hit me 30 times a day and expect to get away with it." The woman glared and started to throw rocks at the _Black Pearl _when there was a SPLOOSH noise. Anamaria looked down the beach.

"MY BOAT!" She screamed as she ran towards it. She then hugged her little boat before pushing it into the water and starting to sail away. Unfortunately, the sharks had only patched it up with a rock, which popped out once the boat was in deep water. Ana screamed as her boat sank. The _Jolly Mon_ stayed there on the ocean floor for eternity.

**THE END.**


	6. Chapter 6 Candles

"So...What are we doing today?"Jack asked as he sat down in the sand beside the one person he'd like least to have with him on a deserted island,his old comrade, Hector Barbossa.

"I ain't doin' nothin' with **you** Sparrow, so yeh can just go and entertain yerself somewhere far away from me." The older pirate replied moodily gazing out at the open ocean. Jack sighed boredly, letting himself fall backwards.

"And how do you suggest I do that, seeing as we are completely alone on an island with no ship and no rum?" He asked, shielding his eyes from the sun with his arm.

Barbossa turned to look at him, eyebrows raised expressing that he was slightly confused." How does rum make yeh go somewhere else?"

"It takes you away to a strange and very...um...colourful place that is sometimes rather odd and confusing."Came the answer. Again there was silence between them. For a few minutes there was nothing but the sound of the waves against the sand, before the silence was broken once again by Barbossa's beach buddy.

"I got a jar of dirt, I got a jar of dirt,I got a jar of dirt, and guess what's inside it."Jack sang under his breath as he picked up handfuls of sand and let them slide through his fingers."I got a jar of dirt, I got a jar of dirt, I got a jar of dirt, and guess what's-"

"Can you belay that?!What are you,three?"Barbossa the sun beating down on them, the words had been repeated many more times than Jack had actually said them inside his head.

"Why?"Jack asked in a whiny tone as he sat up."You told me to entertain myself, and that's what I was doing."

"No, you were trying to annoy me to shut UP!" Jack sighed again as he fell back into the sand there was the long awkward silence.

_'Why couldn't they have stranded me with a woman? At least what's-her-face was a again, we did have a lot of rum...'_Jack thought as he began to dig a small hole in the sand with his fingertips._'What exactly is romance anyway?You always hear people talking about it, but who really knows what it is? What did I hear that one girl say she thought was romantic? It wasn't presents, wasn't my good looks, it was...'_

"Candles."

"Oh, now he's progressed to saying words at random now."Barbossa snapped, thinking Jack had finally gone mad.

"Candles are romantic."Jack said, speaking his entire raised his eyebrows again.

"What the **hell** Jack?!When did we start talkin' about romance?"

"What?It's something to talk about ain't it?"Jack replied, not seeming bothered at all that he'd just been shouted at."Flowers are nice like flowers, those roses especially."

"Are yeh incapable of sitting quietly or do yeh just choose to annoy to the point I'd shoot myself, had I a pistol?"

"A mixture of both."Jack replied with a trademark smirk. Barbossa huffed angrily before turning away again.

"You know what would be really nice?"He said, sarcasm laced through his voice.

"Scented candles."Jack replied.

"What are you going on about now?Scented candles."

"Just think about it."Jack replied."Ladies like candles and the smell of them and BOOM!"He meshed his hands together for emphasis."You have an instant romantic it wouldn't need to stop at flowers. No, you could get ones that smelled like cookies and perfume and the sea...and rum. Ooh, rum would be good."He then glanced at Barbossa, eyes locking."Want to try some?"

Feeling disgusted and disturbed, Barbossa hauled himself up off the ground and took off down the beach.

"Oh well."Jack said to himself."More for me."He then pulled a small bottle of rum out of his jacket pocket and took a drink.

_**FIN**_


	7. Chapter 7 Music

"Why don't the two of you just leave me alone?!"Elizabeth shrieked as she stormed into her's and Will's bedroom, locking the door behind her.

"Elizabeth! Please love, I'm sure thoughtless William got you _something_."Jack said, leaning against the door.

"Jack, just leave!"Elizabeth's voice stormed from behind the door.

"Elizabeth, I didn't forget your birthday I swear!I've just been so busy lately. Darling, I love you."Will said, shoving Jack aside.

"Lizzy, if may put in a word, your dear William here is a brainless-OUCH!"

Will smacked Jack on the head and hissed,"Shut up, you drunken idiot!Your making it worse!"Jack nonchalantly then leaned against the wall, humming a tune.

**Jack:**

"Pretty woman,

Fascinating...

Sipping coffee,

Dancing...

Pretty woman

Is a wonder.

Pretty woman!"

"Now what are you doing?"Will snapped, trying to open the door to get to his sobbing Elizabeth.

"Singing."Jack replied before picking up the tune again.

**Jack:**

Sitting in the window or

Standing on the stair

Something in her,

Cheers the air.

Pretty woman

Will then decided to join in after a painful nudge in the ribsfrom Jack.

"Your woman."Jack said.

**Will:**

Silhouetted...

**Jack:**

Stay within you,

**Will:**

Glancing...

**Jack:**

Stay forever,

**Will:**

Breathing lightly...

**Jack:**

Pretty woman,

Elizabeth's sobbing ceased as she pressed her ear against the door to listen to the men outside her door singing to her.

**Both:**

Pretty woman!

Blowing out her candles or

Combing out her hair,

Even when she leaves

She still is there.

**Jack:**

She's there!

**Both:**

Ah! Pretty woman,

**Jack:**

At her mirror,

**Will:**

In her garden,

**Jack:**

Letter-writing,

**Will:**

Flower-picking,

**Jack:**

Weather-watching.

**Both:**

How they make a man sing!

Proof of heaven as you're living,

Pretty woman!

The words were beginning to make Elizabeth weep, she could tell this came from both their hearts, black and pure.

**Jack:**

Yes, pretty woman!

Here's to pretty woman,

**Both:**

Pretty woman,

Pretty woman,

**Will:**

Pretty woman!

"STOP!"Elizabeth cried, throwing open the door."That was so beautiful, I don't need to hear another word!"She then jumped at both of them, kissing both their cheeks gratefully.

"Mind moving that kiss to the left and northward?OUCH!"Jack asked, only to receive a slap to the back of his head and his recently kissed then passed out from drunken stupor and because _might _ have hit a pressure point.

"I love you."Will and Elizabeth then said to one another as they ran into their bedroom.


End file.
